It's been a long day. It's been a long year
I could've gone home, but I came here
Listen to some music, check out the bands
But the guy with the microphone
Seems to like only making demands
And I'm thinking, c'mon, c'mon c'mon now
If you're gunna play a song, play a song
I've got an eager ear and I'm here to hear
My tastes are broad and my patience long
Don't get me wrong, but I need to make this clear, you hear?
I don't wanna sing along
I don't wanna put my hands up
I don't wanna make some noise, or go "woah oh, ohoh oh"
I won't clap or cheer or dance or even sway. No chance! No way!
I wouldn't go "Woo" in a pink fit
Ooh, and I don't wanna give it up, unless giving it up is the "it"
Give up the "give it up" bit, unless giving it up is the "it" we're giving up
Call me a grumpy git... I don't give a damn, not a hoot, not a bit
But having said that, I hope you don't think
That I'm not happy here, sipping my drink
Listening to the music, eventually
And respond in a way that on the day feels right to me
It may be quite subtle, just a tap of a toe
Or a tilt of a head. It might not even show
I'm gunna stay po-faced and proud, I'm not easily wowed
But if you're really great, I might talk to my mate a little less loud
Well, I know just trying to build the vibe, unite us like a team or a tribe
And if all the rest seem keen to roll with that, for sure, have a ball, you don't need my bat
But I suggest I'm not the sole surly soul in here
Who longs to hear a song sometime this year
Skip the trite hype, corny, ham and cheese.
'Cos when you say "Give it up", I say "Please"
You may be amazing, no doubt, you could go far
Just stop raving about how good you are
When you say "hello Melbourrrrne!" don't expect me
To cheer til I hear you pronounced it correctly
When you say "how're you feeling?", I may frown
Knowing you don't really wanna know how I feel deep down
If it were amusing or original I'd join in gladly
But sadly it's the same old schtick done badly
© Mal Webb 2011